What a secure World we live in. There is absolutely no chance for any attacks by “anti-social elements”. We can live, work and play, secure in the knowledge that the Security Guards in our Apartment/Housing Complex, Office or Recreation Facility, will take care of us 100%.

Right?

You wish!!!

Security Guards (atleast from what I have seen so far in Bengaluru) operate based on some ground rules. The rules, not in any particular order of importance, are:

(01) No attacks will happen between 8PM and 8AM.

(02) Checking a vehicle thoroughly means opening the trunk and closing it in 0.002 seconds, even if the trunk is filled with 14 bags.

(03) 8PM to 6AM is a great window to get some quality sleep (They are well aware that doctors advise atleast 7 hours of sound sleep).

Let me elaborate each point.

(01) Whether it is my Apartment Complex or the Technology Park where I work or the Shopping Mall, before 8AM, all cars (and maybe even battle tanks!) are allowed to pass through with not even a cursory glance. Me being an early morning person, gets to see this every single day. Many a time, part of me wants to stop, get out of the car and question the Guard as to why all these random vehicles, including taxis with yellow license plates and with all kinds of stickers on them, are allowed to go through with zero checks. I actually did do it a couple of times. The Guard gave me the vibe that he took my complaint/suggestion very seriously and he even scolded some other guy in my presence. I thought, “Problem Solved!”. Well, the very same earnest (so I thought!) dude repeated the exact same thing the next day.

(02) “Checking a vehicle thoroughly” = “Creating a world record in how quickly you can open and shut the trunk”! In my previous company, atleast occasionally, they used sniffer dogs. But in most of the other places, I guess the Security Guards have very sensitive noses. Also, there seems to be an inherent assumption that only the trunk will be used to transport dangerous objects. If I have an empty trunk, but filled backseat (with 7 loaded bags), my car is still considered very secure! Also, office bags are never checked on the way in. Here the ground rule being followed is that if dangerous object has to be transferred into a building, office bags will never be used.

(03) I feel that it is unreasonable to expect Security Guards, who probably work in the morning shift as well, to stay awake through the night. Also, they are being paid pittance. To me it seems like the Security Agencies milk the Corporations/Complexes and give a very small percentage to the Guards themselves. Most of the time, the sleeping guard wakes up when I walk in, and atleast quickly arrange his uniform and hair and has an embarrassed expression on his face. But occasionally, I have seen the Guard wake up and have a “What the -bleep-???” expression on his face, and calmly going back to sleep. I cant say I fully blame him.

In my opinion, this entire Security Industry is a sham. If someone, remotely intelligent, wants to do harm, he/she can find 1029755 ways to break the “Security Barrier”. No kidding …

Adios!